If it ain't Scottish it's CRAP

 Aye ,Just got off the phone with my cousin Brian from Alford Scotland. He's absolutely furios with the outcome of the referendum to leave the UK. He said and I quote." You Yanks got it rrrright, the Bluuudy Bastard  Brits have wooun it again, There will be Bloood in the streets of Alford tooonite!  As soooon as weee finish rrrrrr game of Darts Mind Ya. " I said " Are you pissed Brian? Aaaaaye and I'm Full of Pisss as well, Just one more Pint shooed do it Mr. blackjack." Brian is a roofer during the day and a damn fine drunk by night, makes his ancestors proud he does. Aaaye. I ended the conversation " Have a Weeee Dram for me". He responded " If you were here I wooood kick yourrrr Aaass Mr. blackjack, Damn stereotypes. Got to run my Nude Bicycle group is meeting for a ride, Don 'to forget your Gold Bond. Missoula sucks